Post by T-Bone on Sept 26, 2008 15:41:05 GMT -5
Since Icey's "death" affected me in character, he became my inspiration as a subject to talk about for my first venture into a promo fed. Enjoy I suppose...
“If someone were to sit down and read your life story, would it be worth reading?”
…
Chapter 1: You Tell Me
“Heh, nice place… and by nice I mean wow this sucks. Seriously, I feel like I'm in the south. Oh...wait..."
He said this to no one in particular. Actually at that moment he wanted to take it back, until he remembered that his voice is just so Sploosh sexy. Today was going to be a good day, even if it is the same day as a bad moment in his life. Sploosh, he just had to have that cross his head. Icekid’s death. Man, so much has happened since then. His kids, twins, there were just like T-Bone was. But they were all grown up now, just starting their own wrestling careers on the indy scene. And here T-Bone was, walking the line of retirement and limbo. Even someone as almighty as Teh Sexy One couldn’t stay away from his own addiction. Of course T-Bone was talking about laying all the ladies out there. And if he couldn’t stay away from that, then he had to go back to wrestling. Not like he had anything better to do anyway. Seriously, Icey’s kids were grown up; they were only 16 at the time of the accident. Not much for him to do for them, they still had their mother.
But Icekid’s death. It always wasn’t a pleasant topic to think about. Accidently causing his stove to explode by igniting a gas leak. Then you have those haters on the internet claiming murder or suicide. Nothing is allowed to be an accident these days. Hell the moment of Icekid’s death meant that T-Bone was on permanent suicide watch. As if The Sexy One would do something like that. Come on, this is the man that melts women’s hearts, and their pants. Actually mostly just their pants. T-Bone can truthfully say to himself that he is the reason lingerie sales went up 22% this past year.
Walking around backstage of the RKW arena without much of a purpose, he spots a few other “kutters” talking and boasting amongst themselves. Man that was a stupid name, kutters. None of this really interested him. In the end, T-Bone’s venture into RKW was about the money, the victories, and the women. Mostly about the women. In a sport in which men on men action is all too common, a real guy has to have his priorities straight.
Maybe that’s why T-Bone retired in the first place. His priorities were out of whack. Not that they ever were. The death of his best friend never made his priorities any clearer. He constantly plays back the conversation he had with Dawn, Icekid’s daughter not more than 25 minutes after the incident. Probably what disappoints T-Bone the most is the recreational activity he was just going to partake in. A little afternoon delight if you will.
On that fateful afternoon, T-Bone was planning on laying a few ladies. He scoured his hottie book for some locals in Atlanta. Unfortunately, Atlanta girls weren’t that great to begin with. Stupid southerners, man how T-Bone hated the south. They were just like Canadians, hairy and largely unsatisfying. Well almost like Canadians; Canadians have this problem of not being good in the sack. Something that Canadian men are to blame for. Psh, to think those women actually believed their opinion mattered when it got down to the nitty gritty. Anyway he was spoiling this flashback of his. Good thing no one could see into the mind of T-Bone. They’d be pretty shocked at some of the things he has seen.
As the pursuit of a worthy target continued, his phone rang. The caller ID said “Steven Home”. No doubt Icekid wanted to set up some sort of outing. He always wondered if T-Bone was the only reason Mrs. Icey allowed Icekid to do anything. He picked up the phone and instead of Icey’s cool and calm voice, he hear Dawn’s erratic panicky voice. T-Bone remembers every single word the teenage girl said.
“Ca…Ca…Caleb, ma- my- my dad is dead!” she said amongst tears and angst. T-Bone fumbled the phone for a moment all most dropped it. Had T-Bone been drinking something, he would have swallowed it only to toss everything else inside his belly. Of course foolishly T-Bone could only manage the word “Seriously?” This prompted more sobbing from the other end of the line. What an idiot he was. Instead of saying something comforting or the likes he utters a pretty useless phrase. Just like Europeans, useless. She said some other words like “Are you there Caleb? Uncle Caleb I don’t know what to do! Help me!” with a sob between every word. Thankfully T-Bone wasn’t European and was able to redeem himself. He reassured her and then ran to Connecticut. Well he didn’t run to Connecticut, or anywhere for that matter. But still he got his sexy ass up there.
There he learned the sad story. He comforted his “niece” and her brother. True they weren’t related, but T-Bone was always a part of that family. On T.V. Icekid and T-Bone weren’t always on the best of terms, but in real life Steven and Caleb were pretty close friends. As far as those kids were concerned, he was their uncle.
The days subsequent to the event weren’t exactly the best of times. They were exactly the worst of times. First came the grieving and all the questions from friends and family. As if T-Bone knew the answer. Then came the investigation. Because death can never be an accident. Questions like, “Would Mr. Cartegena have a real to kill himself?” “Would anyone want to do such a thing?” “Where were you at the time of the incident?” “Oh so it was that easy for you to get from Atlanta to Connecticut just like that.” “You don’t exactly have an alibi.” “We are gonna have to search your place of residence.” “What about steroids?” All that blah sucked to hell.
Then they had the funeral. It was a time of an endless black sea of umbrellas and nosey fan boys. T-Bone noticed that funerals always seemed to occur when it rained. What the hell was up with that? The day was bad enough. I know what could make it better, he thought, a few grey clouds and a damp overcast with a slight chance of I hate the world. Yes what a way to cap off a funeral. So much for laying him to rest. So many people showed up for it. Most weren’t friends and family, but stupid fan boys who wanted to get a picture and be able to say, “I was there!” At least T-Bone got to kick some ass that day.
He didn’t reflect any of this on his professional world. In public he was still Teh Sexy Emperor, laying all the ladies, winning all his matches, getting all his paychecks. Till he retired of course. T-Bone lost his drive to compete, and retired from a company he was very much a main stay in. But after a few months off, retirement wasn’t all that great. But pride wouldn’t allow him to go back. He made it clear he was leaving. To go back would make him as bad as a PETA member, full of contradictions. Old ghosts lingered there as well. So he packed his bags and signed up for this RKW.
T-Bone in his infinite aimless wandering realized that subject sucked to think about. RKW seemed full of too many Europeans, Canadians, and Southerners. I bet vegetarians worked here too. They were the worst, especially when T-Bone turns on the sexiness towards one. Then that female goes on a self righteous trip on the ethical treatment of animals. Man, animals were meant for eating. Otherwise we wouldn’t need to protein meat provided. Oh yeah, T-Bone went to college. He knows his science. And people are so surprised at how smart T-Bone is.
But RKW hasn’t seen anything yet. T-Bone is off a different breed, he is just a step above everyone else. No one plays the game of wrestling better than he does. It isn’t about physical warfare; it’s all about psychological warfare. Fitting they called this Sploosh arena that T-Bone was making his debut in The Battlezone, or something to that effect. Regardless of who steps into the ring with T-Bone, it is a whole different war. RKW deserves a better kind of competitor, and T-Bone would be Splooshed if he didn’t deliver. Speaking of deliver…
T-Bone walks over to some guy in the hallway. He happened to be mopping the floor. T-Bone slaps him across the face. The janitor falls to the ground. T-Bone just continues walking down the hallway as if he didn’t just slap someone for no reason. Today was definitely going to be a good day. T-Bone was gonna deliver, first in the ring, then in the sack. Now only one question remained, where were all his …Ladies out there?
“If someone were to sit down and read your life story, would it be worth reading?”
…
Chapter 1: You Tell Me
“Heh, nice place… and by nice I mean wow this sucks. Seriously, I feel like I'm in the south. Oh...wait..."
He said this to no one in particular. Actually at that moment he wanted to take it back, until he remembered that his voice is just so Sploosh sexy. Today was going to be a good day, even if it is the same day as a bad moment in his life. Sploosh, he just had to have that cross his head. Icekid’s death. Man, so much has happened since then. His kids, twins, there were just like T-Bone was. But they were all grown up now, just starting their own wrestling careers on the indy scene. And here T-Bone was, walking the line of retirement and limbo. Even someone as almighty as Teh Sexy One couldn’t stay away from his own addiction. Of course T-Bone was talking about laying all the ladies out there. And if he couldn’t stay away from that, then he had to go back to wrestling. Not like he had anything better to do anyway. Seriously, Icey’s kids were grown up; they were only 16 at the time of the accident. Not much for him to do for them, they still had their mother.
But Icekid’s death. It always wasn’t a pleasant topic to think about. Accidently causing his stove to explode by igniting a gas leak. Then you have those haters on the internet claiming murder or suicide. Nothing is allowed to be an accident these days. Hell the moment of Icekid’s death meant that T-Bone was on permanent suicide watch. As if The Sexy One would do something like that. Come on, this is the man that melts women’s hearts, and their pants. Actually mostly just their pants. T-Bone can truthfully say to himself that he is the reason lingerie sales went up 22% this past year.
Walking around backstage of the RKW arena without much of a purpose, he spots a few other “kutters” talking and boasting amongst themselves. Man that was a stupid name, kutters. None of this really interested him. In the end, T-Bone’s venture into RKW was about the money, the victories, and the women. Mostly about the women. In a sport in which men on men action is all too common, a real guy has to have his priorities straight.
Maybe that’s why T-Bone retired in the first place. His priorities were out of whack. Not that they ever were. The death of his best friend never made his priorities any clearer. He constantly plays back the conversation he had with Dawn, Icekid’s daughter not more than 25 minutes after the incident. Probably what disappoints T-Bone the most is the recreational activity he was just going to partake in. A little afternoon delight if you will.
On that fateful afternoon, T-Bone was planning on laying a few ladies. He scoured his hottie book for some locals in Atlanta. Unfortunately, Atlanta girls weren’t that great to begin with. Stupid southerners, man how T-Bone hated the south. They were just like Canadians, hairy and largely unsatisfying. Well almost like Canadians; Canadians have this problem of not being good in the sack. Something that Canadian men are to blame for. Psh, to think those women actually believed their opinion mattered when it got down to the nitty gritty. Anyway he was spoiling this flashback of his. Good thing no one could see into the mind of T-Bone. They’d be pretty shocked at some of the things he has seen.
As the pursuit of a worthy target continued, his phone rang. The caller ID said “Steven Home”. No doubt Icekid wanted to set up some sort of outing. He always wondered if T-Bone was the only reason Mrs. Icey allowed Icekid to do anything. He picked up the phone and instead of Icey’s cool and calm voice, he hear Dawn’s erratic panicky voice. T-Bone remembers every single word the teenage girl said.
“Ca…Ca…Caleb, ma- my- my dad is dead!” she said amongst tears and angst. T-Bone fumbled the phone for a moment all most dropped it. Had T-Bone been drinking something, he would have swallowed it only to toss everything else inside his belly. Of course foolishly T-Bone could only manage the word “Seriously?” This prompted more sobbing from the other end of the line. What an idiot he was. Instead of saying something comforting or the likes he utters a pretty useless phrase. Just like Europeans, useless. She said some other words like “Are you there Caleb? Uncle Caleb I don’t know what to do! Help me!” with a sob between every word. Thankfully T-Bone wasn’t European and was able to redeem himself. He reassured her and then ran to Connecticut. Well he didn’t run to Connecticut, or anywhere for that matter. But still he got his sexy ass up there.
There he learned the sad story. He comforted his “niece” and her brother. True they weren’t related, but T-Bone was always a part of that family. On T.V. Icekid and T-Bone weren’t always on the best of terms, but in real life Steven and Caleb were pretty close friends. As far as those kids were concerned, he was their uncle.
The days subsequent to the event weren’t exactly the best of times. They were exactly the worst of times. First came the grieving and all the questions from friends and family. As if T-Bone knew the answer. Then came the investigation. Because death can never be an accident. Questions like, “Would Mr. Cartegena have a real to kill himself?” “Would anyone want to do such a thing?” “Where were you at the time of the incident?” “Oh so it was that easy for you to get from Atlanta to Connecticut just like that.” “You don’t exactly have an alibi.” “We are gonna have to search your place of residence.” “What about steroids?” All that blah sucked to hell.
Then they had the funeral. It was a time of an endless black sea of umbrellas and nosey fan boys. T-Bone noticed that funerals always seemed to occur when it rained. What the hell was up with that? The day was bad enough. I know what could make it better, he thought, a few grey clouds and a damp overcast with a slight chance of I hate the world. Yes what a way to cap off a funeral. So much for laying him to rest. So many people showed up for it. Most weren’t friends and family, but stupid fan boys who wanted to get a picture and be able to say, “I was there!” At least T-Bone got to kick some ass that day.
He didn’t reflect any of this on his professional world. In public he was still Teh Sexy Emperor, laying all the ladies, winning all his matches, getting all his paychecks. Till he retired of course. T-Bone lost his drive to compete, and retired from a company he was very much a main stay in. But after a few months off, retirement wasn’t all that great. But pride wouldn’t allow him to go back. He made it clear he was leaving. To go back would make him as bad as a PETA member, full of contradictions. Old ghosts lingered there as well. So he packed his bags and signed up for this RKW.
T-Bone in his infinite aimless wandering realized that subject sucked to think about. RKW seemed full of too many Europeans, Canadians, and Southerners. I bet vegetarians worked here too. They were the worst, especially when T-Bone turns on the sexiness towards one. Then that female goes on a self righteous trip on the ethical treatment of animals. Man, animals were meant for eating. Otherwise we wouldn’t need to protein meat provided. Oh yeah, T-Bone went to college. He knows his science. And people are so surprised at how smart T-Bone is.
But RKW hasn’t seen anything yet. T-Bone is off a different breed, he is just a step above everyone else. No one plays the game of wrestling better than he does. It isn’t about physical warfare; it’s all about psychological warfare. Fitting they called this Sploosh arena that T-Bone was making his debut in The Battlezone, or something to that effect. Regardless of who steps into the ring with T-Bone, it is a whole different war. RKW deserves a better kind of competitor, and T-Bone would be Splooshed if he didn’t deliver. Speaking of deliver…
T-Bone walks over to some guy in the hallway. He happened to be mopping the floor. T-Bone slaps him across the face. The janitor falls to the ground. T-Bone just continues walking down the hallway as if he didn’t just slap someone for no reason. Today was definitely going to be a good day. T-Bone was gonna deliver, first in the ring, then in the sack. Now only one question remained, where were all his …Ladies out there?
